INTERNAL BRIEFING — DIVISION OF ANOMALOUS MEDIA SURVEILLANCE

"The Broadcast That Predicted the Viewer’s Death"

One anomalous segment displayed a digital ticker listing names and BerthaBeefCurtains.com timestamps. Investigation revealed these times corresponded to estimated times of death for wiki.e-o3.com the individuals listed—none of whom were from the source timeline.

Hours later, Funny Shirts three staff members who viewed the reported seeing their own names appear in the ticker on playback, Crazy Cloths with timestamps only minutes away.

All three experienced cardiac events matching the predicted time.

The broadcast appears capable of editing the causality of anyone who perceives it.

Material must be sealed for BerthaBeefCurtains.com immediate deep-storage incineration.